The four-day circus known as the Republican National Convention winds down tonight at Quicken Loans Arena, site of the NBA finals just a month ago. That connection between politics and sports made me think of who might be considered the Donald Trump of the jock world.
Considering that ‘The Donald’ is so HUUUUUUUUGE, it definitely takes more than one person to fill his custom-tailored suit. So allow me to play Dr. Frankenstein and assemble this powerful monster of a presidential candidate in three categories:
First: THE ‘FISH OUT OF WATER’ SUCCESS
This successful businessman and reality TV star ran roughshod through the GOP primaries in spite of having absolutely no political experience. Thus, I considered those who tried to transition their success from one sport to to a completely new athletic field (two-sport stars like Bo Jackson don’t count, since they had previous experience in both sports).
The greatest basketball player of all time batted .202 in his one year as a minor league baseball player.
Heisman trophy winner and NFL star Herschel Walker actually placed 7th in the 1992 Olympics in the two-man bobsled.
Then there is Paul DePodesta, who recently became the Browns’ new Chief Strategy Officer after two decades of working his ‘Moneyball’ magic in Major League Baseball.
But the biggest fish out of water has to go to a coach that could easily put ‘The Donald’ in his place…
The same year that he retired from the sidelines, legendary Michigan coach Bo Schembechler actually spent three years as team president of the Detroit Tigers.
II. THE SWAGGER
Trump’s mouth is unparalleled in politics. Even in the macho, competitive bravado of sports, he is hard to match. Most sports figures have some sort of muffler installed between their brain and their mouth to minimize the verbal damage that they might do to the image of themselves and their team. But one NFL coach comes to mind whose unfiltered words are heavy on arrogance and grand declarations…
Rex Ryan has never been afraid to supply bulletin board material for his opponents. If only he had his twin brother Rob’s hair…
Speaking of which:
III. THE HAIR
That hair provides better coverage than the Darelle Revis! It defies the laws of physics. Kinda reminds me of this Cavalier…
They could probably do an entire Mythbusters episode testing the supernatural qualities of these two hairdos.
I do theorize that if Trump hadn’t maintained his wealthy status, his dome might look a bit more like these dueling sports icons…
The options might not be very appealing to many voters, but Donald vs. Hillary is gonna be one wild ride!
Follow the author on twitter: @macaljancic
photos: espn.go.com, nykdailynews.com, foxsports.com, nba.com