I was recently at a meeting where there was an unusual occurrence. A multiple level combination vote was taken and one of the voting participants was not certain the recorded vote was reflective of the individuals views. So the individual asked for a clarification of the vote. Level by level in an effort to make the vote clear. The other, Well meaning committee members, trying their best to help, appeared to be, perhaps a little overly assertive. That enthusiasm, to the observers, looked a who0le lot like bullying.

Sadly, as a member of the audience, and to my shame, I was in such shock and denial at the witnessing of the behavior I sat by and said and did nothing. Nothing. Technically, as an observer I am not supposed to do anything yet I am haunted by the realization that I did nothing. So I am doing something now.

I am adapting some of the suggestions of Christine Comaford, a leadership and culture coach I am familiar with. There are many other experts but I am using someone whose work I am familiar with.
As a society we talk about not allowing bullying in school and so it follows that we should not be allowing even the appearance of bullying in the workplace or in leadership roles in our community.

We all avoid uncomfortable situations so in public places we tolerate them, ignore them or pretend it’s a part of the general normal, or sometimes we even think of it as entertainment. We are giving away our rights, compromising our integrity and demonstrating to our children that bullying is acceptable. I can assure you it is not.

But what do we do about it?

How are we enabling a bully when we are the leader? We allow inappropriate conduct during the meeting. It is the responsibility of the leader to clarify what appropriate meeting etiquette is and to make sure it is followed.
The leader does not become a go-between between parties but makes it very clear that they need to work things out together.
The leader does not compromise their integrity by giving voice to their own temper and by inadvertently demonstrating that bullying is acceptable.

The leader must interrupt the pattern. Take a five minute break. Reset the stage by re-stating the reason for the meeting, the progress made and the steps left to be accomplished. Co-create with the group what is to be accomplished within the next 5, 15 or 30 minutes. Establish a consequence if possible. Table the discussion or motion. Request a ruling. Check the understanding of the issue.

Above all else have and demonstrate respect for one another even when your views differ.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.

How many people want to see downtown Norwich filled with shops, stores, restaurants and people? How many of us want to see the downtown completely revitalized and glistening while still surrounding us with the imagined security of the past? I want that old time feeling with the cleanliness of fresh and new and I am not afraid to say so.

What has stunned me however, was a recent business meeting with a while I am in the neighborhood quick shopping stop. The shopping stop was to a Davids Tea store for a re-supply of fresh loose tea. I had not been to the shop here in Connecticut before located in the Promenade Shops at Evergreen Walk, 501 Evergreen Way, South Windsor, CT. Not far from the Buckland Hills Mall.

I need to take a deep breath to begin to describe the Promenade Shops at Evergreen Walk. It is a beautiful layout that instantly made me feel as if I was in a very successful metropolitan area. It has a very similar layout to downtown Norwich, CT. Evergreen Way is the main street with the cross streets of Tamarack, Laurel, Pine, Hemlock and possibly others whose names I did not catch. There is a huge rotary at one end so drivers can turn around easily. Store front parking on Evergreen and then there are fifteen additional parking lots behind the buildings for staff, visitors and shoppers. One parking lot was designed with the restaurants in mind for valet parking. When not reserved for an event the lot is open to the public.
The cross streets help divide the shops into blocks. Each block has a wide sidewalk, huge showcase windows into the stores, trees, benches and speakers playing soft familiar music. Some of the buildings had only one or two stores while other buildings were filled with boutiques.

I did not have a lot of time so please excuse this short list of the types of stores I saw while I drove through – multiple individual and collective men’s, women’s and children’s apparel stores, outdoor gear, shoes, jewelry, beauty, health, spa, eye wear, electronics, home & houseware, stationery, gift, pet, specialty food, grocery, services, restaurants, grills, bars and food stands. The only thing I do not recall seeing was a bookstore but I could have just missed that. The layout was all that I want for Norwich, CT with the addition of the book store, and the library. I could even imagine the legal and real estate offices on the second floors and gorgeous apartments on the third and fourth floors.

I know of two other Promenade Shops although I do not know if it is the same developer. There is one in Saucon Valley, PA and another in Colorado Springs, CO. Norwich, CT needs a vision. The size of the streets and the blocks and the buildings are very similar and close in size to what we already have here in Norwich, CT. To compete we need to add more open spaces, clean and safe mini-parklets, better lighting and an emphasis on safety. Downtown Norwich has the potential to create a “Promenade Shops” of its own. A bigger and better one but it means that as a city we need to be out there promoting what is right with our city instead of complaining about what is wrong with it and doing nothing to correct it.

Attention candidates running for local office in November 2017. I want to hear your vision. I want to hear your plan of how you are going to accomplish your goals. I want a time line of what you are expecting to do by when. In Norwich, CT we make plans for 99 years in the future and we can no longer do that. We need plans that we can start immediately and have results in one to twenty-five years. The clock is ticking.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.

I just read an article called The Perfect Crossing by Tim De Chant in Wired magazine. De Chant talks and defines some things I have never heard mentioned or even whispered when we talk about resurrecting downtown Norwich. Whether we like it, or approve of it, or even want it to happen, the future is coming. Eventually, the future will even come to Norwich, CT. Probably 30-50 years after its been everywhere else but come it will. So while we are daydreaming about bringing back the good old days of American society and Norwich in particular why don’t we add a few of the items that will prepare us for the future. Small things that our children and grandchildren will be living with and question with awe how we ever lived without. With apologies to Tim DeChant I am going to use his item numbering system.

1. Self-Driving Vehicles – Autonomous cars studded with sensors that respond to automated intersection commands. As do some present day emergency vehicles. Intersections might not have visible traffic signals.
2. Traffic Sensors – In use since the 1960’s some intersections have induction loop sensors that detect the bulk metal of cars/trucks and talk to the signal lights.
3. Sidewalk Bump-outs – Squeeze the roadway as it nears the intersection to slow the traffic navigating the area.
4. Protected Bike Lanes – Those tiny alleyways behind and between buildings too tight for cars have been endorsed by the US Department of Transportation for use as “low stress bicycle networks.”
5. Bike Rails – Metal railings for cyclists to lean on while waiting for lights to change.
6. Bike Signals – A light timed for cyclists to give them a few seconds head start before the regular traffic moves on.
7. Speed Tables – Raises the crossing so the crossing pedestrian and the driver are at the same eye-height.
8. Scrambles – Little islands in the center of large intersections that allow pedestrians to move in different directions safely.
9. Parklets – offer pedestrians a bit of respite.
10. Trees – The bane of traffic engineers but a signal that the area is part of a walkable community.
11. Dedicated Shelters – protect waiting riders from the elements.
12. Induction charging – Chargers embedded into the pavement can juice up the electric busses as they move along their routes.
13. Cool Stations – Leaving the bedrock exposed at certain underground passages offers relief from summer heat.
14. Sidewalk cafes – Are the key to a great urban street. Diners should not be level with car and truck exhausts.
15. Corner stores – Stores that people visit more than once a week are the best use of a corner. Package stores, green grocers, flower shops, and pharmacies.
16. Third Places – “Your first place is your home. Second is work. The third place you spend time can be a coffee shop or a bar.” Where is your third place?

When you think about downtown Norwich, CT you think about the old buildings and alleys. Now it is time to start thinking about the streets and not just creating more or removing the one-ways but how our streets and alleys can be most effectively be used in the future.

Norwich, CT has a future. But we, as residents must build the future by using the strengths we have of our past in new and creative ways. We cannot bring back the past, although we can use it to propel us forward. Share your vision of future Norwich, CT.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.

Have you received the advertising post card from Garde Art Center in New London? It is brilliantly done and Norwich theaters should take note of the concept. The Garde and New London had a lot to work with so they used a 5 ½ by 11 inch post card. On one side eight shows are listed with a photo, date, time, event description, address, website and promotion name. On the reverse side, are the names, addresses and phone numbers for forty-one mostly downtown New London restaurants. With the slogan Grab a Bite . . . Make it a Night! Dinner and a Show! boldly across the top. You choose between a snack or fine dining.

Norwich, CT is home to two tiny theaters. But it is very difficult to find out what is being performed, the dates and times. I almost get the impression they are not really open to the general public but that would be silly. Wouldn’t it? There are four active art galleries in our downtown alone but if you are not on Facebook you may not be aware of the First Friday promotion when the galleries are open late, with music, wine and snacks. It happens the first Friday night of every month from 6 PM – 9 PM. That is twelve times a year when you can stroll and see the talents of neighbors, friends, and visiting artists. You could enjoy a dinner and thirteen eateries where are our promotions?

Occasionally there is a punch card for the downtown bars after the exhibits but nothing to make it an evening. Why don’t we have cards we can put by the phone at home to remind us there are things to do, places to go, places to see and eat? I am not suggesting a large and very pricy promotion but certainly one that can serve as a bulletin board reminder and if more than one organization worked together certainly everyone could benefit.

Once in a while the churches of downtown have an activity as does Bully Busters on the First Friday of a month too. Perhaps some of the youth are interested in making informational signs with arrows that could be adjusted to point to the locations of the various venues.

The signs would not need to be complicated – Food, Performance, Art Gallery, Entertainment, Antiques & Collectables. The signs and there placements could be used as lessons in marketing. Who, What, When, Where, This Way, That Way, How Much, Parking. They could even be in charge of putting them up and taking them down to be used again.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.

Comedy for a Cause is coming to Norwich, CT. Comedian Mike Hanley and a few of his funny, funny, friends are coming to Norwich, CT on Saturday, April 1st for a special fundraising show for the Gallery at the Wauregan. The comedy show will be in the ballroom of the Wauregan in downtown Norwich beginning at 8 PM so there is lots of well-lit close by on the street parking in addition to the three free garage parking structures within a block walking distance. Tickets are only $20. Per person in advance or at the door. Make a reservation by calling Dan Topalis at 860.334.2669.
Plan for a very full night of laughter and fun. The doors will open at 6:30 PM for a silent auction with some wonderful items including a television, DVD player and unique art work as well as a tasting display of delicious local food, wine and beers. New restaurants have opened in the area and this is a great way to try some of their special treats and brews. If you are fussy, bring a favorite bottle to enjoy during the performance.
Maybe you caught Mike Hanley’s act at one of our casino’s here is Connecticut? Or at one of the local comedy competitions? Or maybe it was in Massachusetts, New York or Rhode Island where he frequently performs. When you see him he reminds you of the guy next door but under the spot light he explodes with high energy and a unique story telling style that will have you nodding your head, because it’s a familiar story and you know you have been there, to crying with laughter while at the edge of your seat. He is all about finding the many funny sides to relationships, kids, work and life in general. Seeing one of his shows is always a treat that makes you feel good. You always leave his show with a smile on your face, and a new story to re-tell. Can you tell I am a long-time fan?
Hanley will be bringing at least two other comedians with him that I guarantee will give you an evening of laughter and delight. Just a reminder, donations to a silent auction are a great way to advertise your goods, products or services. You can bring the item that night or drop it off at the Gallery at the Wauregan before hand. Don’t be afraid to be creative. Offer to plant 50 flower bulbs. Fish sit for a long weekend. Prepare a special meal, snack or picnic. This is a fund raiser among friends for a great cause so let’s relax and have a good time.
Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.

Every day of the year is a National Something Day. There are more national something days than there are days of the year. Some days are easier to participate in than others. For example Saturday, June 3, 2017 is National Trails Day.

Everyone is invited to go outside and take a walk. A long walk. A short walk. A stroll or a jog. On pavement or on earth. Alone or in a group. It is a goal most of us can accomplish. The National Trails Day organizers, the American Hiking Organization, really does like to keep things simple and wrote the 11 steps to planning a successful event that work for just about any event.

1. Clarify your goal. Write down in a short declarative sentence your desired outcome for your event. For example: Increase membership by five people.
2. Envision your target participants. Based on your goals, what type of participants will help you reach your goals? For example: Families with young children. Or People outside your existing network.
3. Choose your activities. Select appealing activities for your target audience that will help you reach your goal. For example: A hike or walk. Educational or learning projects or demonstrations.
4. Find an ideal event location. Accessibility, Terrain, Approvals (Organizational and legal if necessary.)
5. Evaluate possible partnerships. Many of the most successful events are collaborative events organized by two or more organizations. Who are you willing to work with and share responsibilities with?
6. Define the logistics. Who is specific will help with signage and parking, participant sign in, event introduction, tool coordination, activity leaders, and rainy day plan.
7. Gather resources. Based on your event create a list of items you will want for your event. Who has access to the materials? For example: Event signage, snacks, sign-in sheets, hand-outs, first aid kit, tables, chairs, activities, clean up materials – trash bags, gloves, recycling.
8. Promote the event. What are the best ways to communicate with my target participants? Social media? Images, graphics, logos? Downloadable or posted fliers? Press release?
9. Where can you register your event for FREE? Which calendars are available in your area and are read by your target audience?
10. Don’t forget to include your sponsors and partners logos on everything that goes out to the public about your event.
11.Remember to breathe and have a plan for success as well as for oops, there is always next year.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.

What is wrong with Mohegan Park in Norwich, CT? Why aren’t there on-line pages filled with photographs during all the different seasons and from the many events that are held there? I constantly see beautiful photos of other places, individual plants, statues, trees, paths, clearings, trails, waterways from other places but from Mohegan Park in Norwich, CT.

No one seems to think that the tiny streams that crisscross the trails have any interest or beauty. The little wooden bridge near the Lower Pond is never interesting to someone. How sad that in a 100 wood park there is not one tiny bloom that causes one person to stop and ponder the wonders of the universe. The individual trees do not seem to stand out to photographers and they fail to have interest when they are grouped together.

From other places I have seen photos of mushrooms, grass, insects, abandoned and lively insect homes. Seeds lying about in other places and those just beginning to sprout or all the way to those in full bloom to those who have passed. But none were from Mohegan Park in Norwich, CT.

The Park wildlife must be supremely ugly as no one risks the breaking of a lens to photograph them gamboling about. When was the last time someone spoke of the cacophony of bird song they enjoyed while resting on a bench or while fishing? Have you ever spotted the home of a wood elf at the base of a tree or seen the castle of their king? No photos of a child discovering the wonders that are sure to live amongst the trees, ferns, flora and fauna.

Why doesn’t someone find the ducks and the geese poised or smart or funny when in the water they dive, play, feed or as they walk on land? Is there something wrong with the hoof and paw prints that are left in the soft mud or earth? Something that makes them less interesting than a similar print found in other parks and places?

How can the park become the place where the views seen in the distance, or the sky or the ground at their feet become appreciated? Are we the taxpayers and residents of the Park doing something wrong? Please tell me what we as a city can do to improve your perception of Mohegan Park.

Thank you for reading and sharing my blog freely with your family or friends or anyone you think might be interested or in a position to take on some of the suggested projects. Don’t hesitate to contact me for further information. I am happy to pass along anything I can. Together we can make a difference. Email comments on this blog to berylfishbone@yahoo.com View my past columns at http://www.norwichbulletin.com/section/blogs.