Tag Archives: ranking

It’s Batman Day! Here’s How All the Cape Crusader’s Films Rank

BatmanComicIssue1,1940Batman is the best superhero, that has never really been up for discussion (you either think that or you’re wrong). So in honor of Batman Day, here are how all the live-action films of the Caped Crusader stack up.

 

 

 

 

7.) Batman and Robin (1997)

This will be last on everyone’s rankings of Batman films, if not worst movies of all-time, period. It killed the franchise and left us Batman-less for eight years, and it really isn’t a wonder why. It tried to be campy and self-satirical like the old Adam West Batman but left out all the fun and joy that that style brings, and oh my god the puns…so many puns… The one plus I can give this film is it’s hilarious if you watch it as a comedy; like, it really is hysterical how badly they botched this. Oh, well. At least we’ll always have the Bat Nipples.

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Variety

6.) Batman Returns (1992)

This one is often split among the Batman community; some appreciate its dark tone and twisted gothic looks, others (myself included) just didn’t enjoy what it was trying to be. Danny DeVito and Michelle Pfeiffer are perfect as the Penguin and Catwoman, however their performances aren’t enough to make this a good Batman film.

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5.) Batman Forever (1995)

I think this one gets a bad rap. Much like “Batman Returns,” this film is highlighted by its villains. Tommy Lee Jones has the time of his life playing Two-Face and Jim Carrey, who was coming off 1994, the best year an actor has ever had at the box office and was as hot as anything, nails the Riddler. Val Kilmer replaced Michael Keaton as Batman and does a solid job, and they at least tried to stick to the comics.

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4.) The Dark Knight Rises (2012)

This was never going to match “The Dark Knight,” but it was a little disappointing how much of a drop-off this was from its predecessor. The film is far from bad, but there are dozens of plot holes and Nolan goes from perfectly depicting Bane (my favorite villain as a kid) to turning him into a lovesick puppy dog with a horrible death (spoilers, but like if you haven’t seen TDKR by now and are reading a list of Batman films, you clearly don’t want to). It’s a fun movie, but unfortunately that’s where it ends.

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3.) The Dark Knight (2008)

This film is grossly overrated but it is still great. Christopher Nolan’s crime drama created the new, gritty realism of comic book films (one could argue that may be more bad than good, as that tone is what ruined films like “Man of Steel”), and featured a fantastic performance from Heath Ledger (although not the best depiction of the Joker, more on that in a second).

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2.) Batman (1989)

Tim Burton’s original Batman film in a way revolutionized the superhero genre. He put his faith in comic Michael Keaton to portray the Dark Knight and he crushes it, and Jack Nicholson gives the best Joker portrayal to date (read a comic book, haters). I have loved this movie ever since I saw it on VHS as an 8-year-old home sick from school, and is the second best-ever Batman film.

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1.) Batman Begins (2005)

Yes, this is better than “The Dark Knight.” Just from a movie perspective it is more coherent and engaging than its successor, and when you take loyalty to the comics into account the separation between the two becomes ever greater. Christian Bale remains the best Bruce Wayne/Batman that we have, and Liam Neeson’s Ra’s al Ghul partnered with Cillian Murphey’s Scarecrow gives us the best (and more logical) bad guy evil plan of the Nolan trilogy. Gotham felt like a real, breathing city and not like Detroit (or Detroit, Pittsburgh, New York and Los Angeles like in TDKR), and that is just one of the reasons why “Batman Begins” is, and likely will forever remain, the best Batman movie of all-time.

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From ‘Avengers’ to ‘Thor 2’, Let’s Rank the Marvel Movies

With the release of “Avengers: Age of Ultron” it is only natural to create a list ranking all the Marvel movies so far. Because why have your own opinion when you can read mine, right? From 11 to number one, here is how the Avenger movies stack up in my book.

11.) THOR: THE DARK WORLD

I think this one is universally accepted as the weakest entry in the franchise, and is the only genuinely bad film of the series to date. People said the first “Thor” was forced and felt obligatory (more on that in a second), but this one made its predecessor look like the epitome of Marvel movies and how they should be. It is dumb, noisy and boring, and features a material with a changing list of abilities. It really felt like nothing but a cash grab for the entire runtime. Thank God they’re making a third one, right? [sighhh]

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Variety

10.) CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER

Many things in this one work, however there are a lot of aspects that simply don’t. It features some fun 1940’s World War II scenery, not to mention the whole scrawny Steve Rogers thing was well-done, but at times felt disjointed, featured a material with a plot-reliant list of powers (seeing a pattern?), and essentially was one big movie trailer for the “Avengers”.

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ScreenRant

9.) THOR

It is a lot of fun, and thanks to director Kenneth Branagh has a nice Shakespearian flare about it. Forget that Loki’s plot doesn’t make sense when you think about it for more than a minute and that most everything that happens is negated by the next film. It still is light years better than its sequel.

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 8.) THE INCREDIBLE HULK

Before Mark Ruffalo was turning green, Edward Norton starred as everyone’s favorite physicist with an anger issue. The film features a fun villain (Tim Roth’s Abomination) and was the first real hint that the Marvel Cinematic Universe was going to actually come to fruition.

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7.) IRON MAN 2

Sure, this film has its flaws and is nowhere near as good as its predecessor, but it is too much fun to hate. Downey’s charm is impossible to resist and let’s be honest: this is still a way better sequel than “Thor 2” (yep, I’m just going to keep bashing).

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ScreenRant

6.) GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY

Now we’re getting into good-near-great territory. When this came out last year, few knew what it was; much less that it was a part of the Marvel Universe. However 9 months and $775 million later, you would be hard-pressed to find someone who hasn’t seen the misadventures of Rocket and Groot. It is random and colorful and just a lot of fun.

Variety

Variety

5.) AVENGERS: AGE OF ULTRON

It may not be the redefining superhero film some were hoping for, and may feature one of those darn ability-changing materials, but it is honestly hilarious and features some of the most ingenious and entertaining action sequences I’ve seen in a long time.

Variety

Variety

4.) THE AVENGERS

I’m not a fanboy of this film like it seems most people are, I recognize its flaws (like its darn use of an ability changing—forget it), but it was able to fit six superheroes into one film seamlessly, and was immense fun to boot.

Variety

Variety

3.) IRON MAN 3

This is where people may scratch their heads and/or get upset, depending on how much of a comic book fan they are. I personally loved this film, thanks in large part to director Shane Black’s writing. It is clever, self-referential and had some nice twists. It’s been two years; let’s stop pretending that one scene ruined this entire movie.

Variety

Variety

2.) CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER

I adore this film. I saw it three times in theaters alone. It blew me away. It is everything the first “Captain America” was not, and in all the best ways. It is perfectly directed, cleverly written and immensely entertaining. It could be argued that it could be the top choice on the list, and I would have no arguments. It’s that much fun.

Variety

Variety

However it is not number one, because that title belongs to…

1.) IRON MAN

And here it is, the one that started it all. I remember seeing the trailers for this one and thinking it looked dumb, and leaving the theater floored. It was nothing like I had ever seen before, and remains, in my humble opinion, the greatest comic book movie ever made (“what about ‘The Dark Knight’?!” Oh, stop with that nonsense). It reintroduced the world to Robert Downey Jr., and seven years later I think we are all the better for it.

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There’s my list of the Marvel movies from top to bottom. I am excited to see how “Ant-Man” (the final film in Phase 2 of the Marvel Cinematic Universe) plays out this July, mostly just because Paul Rudd is the man. However the film I really can’t wait for is “Captain America: Civil War”, which drops next May. Honestly, “Batman v Superman” is cool and all, but I am more pumped to see Iron Man take on Captain America, mostly because that film isn’t being directed by Zach Snyder…

Worst Films of 2014

What goes up must come down. There were some great films in 2014, so it only makes sense that there were some stinkers.

Unlike my Top Films list, I saw most every bad movie in 2014. There were some that were bad and just didn’t make the cut, such as “Transcendence” and “Annie”, and please do not take those films not being on this list as my approval for you to see them. But without further ado…

Dishonorable Mention: Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

I really didn’t get the hype around this one. I liked the first film but found the sequel boring and pretty uneventful, and by the time we reached the monkeys firing machine guns while riding horses, I had long checked out.

Variety

Variety

10.) Think Like A Man Too

The first film was charming, witty and funny. This film was the opposite of all those things, even with Kevin Hart at his Kevin Hart-iest. I wish this Vegas-set sequel had stayed in Vegas…

Variety

Variety

9.) The Other Woman

I chuckled a few times at this but overall it is a chick flick that is actually insulting to women and their intelligence, so I’m not exactly sure the demographic they were going for here…

Variety

Variety

8.) Ride Along

Hello, Mr. Hart. We meet again. This wasn’t a *bad* movie, it just was a comedy that wasn’t funny. Like, at all. The storyline was basic and cliché, so it wasn’t even like that could hold my attention. Congrats (?) to Hart and director Tim Story for making this list twice.

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7.) Exodus: Gods and Kings

A movie involving ancient Egypt, gods, plagues and all that fun schtuff shouldn’t be boring. Throw in Batman himself Christian Bale and it really, REALLY shouldn’t be boring. Yet, alas, “Exodus” is boring. Like, check-my-phone-every-ten-minutes boring. Leave it to Hollywood to create yet another movie that is nowhere near as good as the book on which the film is based.

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Variety

6.) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

There’s really not much to say about this one. Michael Bay produced it. Megan Fox starred in it. I mean, if those aren’t red flags then I don’t know what are…

Variety

Variety

5.) Transformers: Age of Extinction

Dammit, Michael Bay, when will you stop ruining our childhoods?! You want a plot summary of this movie? Here it is: boom. Boom. Boom BOOM. [objectification of women] Boom. BOOM….boom. Like, this is worse than “Revenge of the Fallen” and once I hit the period ending this sentence I will never have to think about Transformers 4 ever again.

Variety

Variety

4.) Blended

[sighhhhhhhh] I hate Adam Sandler.

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Variety

3.) Annabelle

A scary movie that isn’t scary. Actors that make adult film stars look like Oscar contenders. This thing was a mess. When the doll is the best actor in your film, you know you have a problem.

Variety

Variety

2.) Tammy

I think I laughed…once (?) during this movie. But it wasn’t just me; my theater was dead quiet the whole film. If I wasn’t sick of Melissa McCarthy before, I sure am after seeing this movie. It is just not funny and what’s worse is it’s awkward. And what’s worse yet is when the jokes awkwardly don’t work, the film tries to throw in some drama which doesn’t work, so then THAT adds onto the awkwardness. [exhale] Point is this movie isn’t good.

Variety

Variety

And “Tammy” would have been the worst film of 2014 had it not been for…

1.) Lucy

It really wasn’t a good year for films with women’s names as their title (see the previous three movies, as well as “Annie”). When I walked out of the theater after seeing “Lucy” on that muggy July afternoon, I knew I had just witnessed the worst 2014 had to offer. “Lucy” is stupid, stupid, stupid. As Scarlett Johansson gets smarter, this movie only gets more unintelligent. The ending is also an insult to the audience, as if the director had no idea how to conclude the picture so he threw his hands up and said, “Screw it! The audience is probably asleep by now anyways!” Some people actually liked this movie and it makes me honestly hope Charles Darwin was right about natural selection.

Variety

Variety

Do you agree with my list? Any movies you thought were worse than these? See a film on here that you actually thought was good? Let me know in the comments!